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Indeed it is the only true mark of a "real Dom. Most likely. He told me a few times he would respect my limits and learn from my cues when to stop.

I might have not really known what my limits were. It's not like I told him: "No, I don't want to be blind-folded for three weeks".

I could have used my "Red Light" safe word any time I wanted. I am guessing that his decision to present me to his new girls was motivated by his attempt to grew out of our experience and not repeat the mistakes he had made with me.

My former therapist and my boyfriend are in full agreement with you. With time, I began to share their point of view.

But you have to understand that I was raised by a mother who taught me that you couldn't say no to your man even if he abused you.

I absolutely agree with you. I am guessing there is a reason why he chose to keep me isolated: so that I couldn't figure out all of this on my own.

In the end, I guess I was lucky he not only accepted I wanted to leave, but that he helped me gain independence. I agree, and in his defense, he was like that in the beginning.

After every session for I guess the first 8 to 10 months, we had lengthly discussions about my feelings and what I thought.

It's near the end that he seemed to lose focus of my importance and that it became frightening. The 3 weeks blindfold occurred in the last few weeks and caused me to leave.

Same thing with the no speaking rules. That is quite possible. Perhaps he was just considerate in the beginning because he was afraid I would want to leave and slowly begun to care less and less about what I thought.

Thanks a lot for your long text. I wish someone in the dungeon would have explained it all to me before I accepted.

It would have enabled me to make a more informed decisions and if I would have said yes, to set clearer boundaries and get into a more sane relationship.

To be fair, Frank didn't feed her drugs. He didn't do anything without her permission she was allowed to say no to a list of things , and he respected her using the safe-word instead of just continuing to torture or rape her.

I think he's just a working-class guy who simply is ignorant about the effects of sunlight deprivation and long term sensory deprivation.

I think he cared enough that if he knew the repercussions of such actions on health, he would have made some changes. Aye but you have to take responsibility when someone trusts you to be a master in that position.

Surely he should have considered her previous life and issues before convincing her to do something so emotionally taxing.

It isn't black and white - it doesn't sound like he intended to abuse her or take advantage of her, but managed to do that anyway due to not being careful.

Background: I have been active in the BDSM community since I was in my 20s. So now to my point. In the gay community, its long been known that there is an issue with codependency and domestic abuse.

Gay people in unhealthy relationships are reluctant to go find outside help because they dont want to have to come out of the closet.

In the kink scene the problem is doubly compounded with atatudes like "who are you to judge" and "what they do may seem extreme, but its just a difrent lifestyle choice" and "your kink is not my kink but your kink is ok".

When I questioned this setup the person who organized it took me aside and told me I wasn't welcomed back until I could be more "open minded".

Ya want to know how people in the BDSM community think? Ask your fellow perverts their opinion of the Glenn Marcus court case. She sells her house and gives all the money to her new master.

Sells all her possessions but for one set of clothes and her car and gives all the money to her new master. Drives cross country to go live with him as his ful time slave.

When she gets there she sells her car giving all the money to her new master and burns her last set of clothes. He burns his initials into her thigh using a coat hanger he had heated up over the stove and carves the word slave into her stomach.

She then runs a website braging and looking down her nose at everyone else because she had the guts to do bdsm "for real". A few years later she finaly wakes up to what is going on reports conflict but some news says that the final straw was when Glenn tried to recrute the womans sister to come be a slave as well and she leaves.

Glenn posts a notice on the website offering a reward for information about her location so he could "get his property back".

She eventually goes to the FBI because she wants the pictures from the website taken down. But as I said, it used to be worse.

Back in the mid 90s I remember that every newbie was directed to Glenn Marcuss website so they could read all about what real bdsm was truely all about.

I would read it and everything on it reminded me of a religious cult. I was the only person I knew at all who didnt have high words of praise for its content.

The kinds of actions from the OP disturb me as well. But I wouldent go as far as to say that everyone in the BDSM scene would be disturbed as well.

Heck, its a rare happening but I have on more than one occasion talked with someone else in the scene who comes to the defense of Armin Meiwes because what he did was consensual and in their mind ANYTHING that is consensual ought to be ok.

But I dont think that every last person in the BDSM scene would be disgusted. Thank you so much for your comment. The normal BDSM community is just not being represented at all in her experience, and although she is free to talk about it, it hurts me that such a negative experience gets so many upvotes.

It just gives us a horrible name. How many more people will think that people who are involved in BDSM are always so mentally unstable and dangerous?

How many more hypocrites will base their opinion of BDSM off of this experience? The only BDSM news that is popular are ones where something terrible has happened.

I'm shocked that he neglected the fact that you need regular medical care and sunshine. You say he learned his lesson? Other than that he was a good master and thank god he respected your safe word!

It fascinates me that you somehow equated this to a second babyhood and seemingly managed to partially heal yourself from your lousy childhood through this.

He gave me vitamin D pills to compensate and I am rarely sick, especially then when I didn't see anyone. What bothers me the most is the lack of dentist visits, but to be honest, it's not like my parents took me there regularly before then.

It's only when my boyfriend mentioned he could have been a pychopath and simply killed me that I was afraid.

I guess I really missed basic education in my childhood. To my boyfriend it's rather disturbing, but somehow, I managed to heal myself during that period.

Perhaps I was lost in my thoughts a lot more. Perhaps I simply was away from the negative influence of my mother. I made this account just to talk to you.

We are a normal couple outside the bedroom, though lately we have let the fetishes spill into the outside too and I think I'm naturally completely submissive to him.

I didn't have a shitty childhood, but I do have a lot of issues in general. My boyfriend is absolutely incredible and he truly cares and loves me.

But I always wondered if one of the things that attracted me to this relationship so much was the appeal of having someone who could appease these issues.

Particularly considering the nature of what we do daddy dom. I don't know, but your post made me think, thanks for that :.

You welcome, I have to say it's weird seeing you articulate the feelings that I sometimes have too, very weird actually.

I think the main difference is that I am submissive, it's ingrained into who I am, whether it seems like you just did it because fuck it, what else did you have to do?

Do you see what I mean? You're happy not having BDSM for example, I couldn't be in a relationship that didn't have that Am I right about this or not?

If its worth anything I dont feel you were just lost in thought, rather you learned the ability to self soothe. If your mother durning infancy was more emotionally available and attuned to your emotional needs then you might have internalized this ability.

I was babysat as a kid by a nice family, because my mother was still working then I have no idea doing what , but she stopped when I was 4 or 5. I try to avoid alcohol today because I don't really know if I was ever an alcoholic, but the few times I took a drink like champagne at a wedding , I didn't need a second one.

What nationality are you? I keep noticing quirky uses of language and I can't put my finger on it. She's misusing tense all the time.

This might hint at one of two things: either she's not an English native — people who didn't grow up with it usually have a lot of problems with the rather idiosyncratic and complex system of English tense.

Or she's misrepresenting the time-scale of the events intentionally. It is interesting, overall, that her use of language is all-in-all pretty good, but not her use of tense.

This would hint at a higher likelihood of the second scenario; though I wouldn't go shout 'liar liar pants on fire' just yet. Oh well, I guess I don't come here for the truth.

I come here for the entertainment, and this was a good story OP is not a professional writer and the narrator of the story said they dropped out of school.

In the comments, the OP says that she went back to high school, but the narrator left her master at 20 years old so it was probably a GED program?

But i also brushed habitually. Was your dental hygiene or general hygiene for that matter any different than normal? There's a huge, huge, huge genetic component as well.

I'm the only person that I know that brushes and flosses twice a day going out for the evening? Possibility I won't be sleeping at home?

Toothbrush in pocket. My dentist tells me that my teeth and gums are healthy and clean, and that I'm doing as well as I can, but there are some factors that you really can't control.

This is an interesting story. Thank you for being brave enough to share. I have a few questions :. I miss the simplicity of it all.

No job, no worries, no trouble. Every time I do my taxes or wonder if I can buy a new pair of pants, I have flashbacks to those 16 months.

When we used to have friends over, I had flashbacks to the time Frank had people over and tended at first to remain quiet. No, because I could have simply told him at any time that I wanted to leave, which I ended up doing in the end.

The saddest part, is that I don't think I will ever be happier than in the first 12 months or so that I was there.

Back then, I had been miserable up to the moment I accepted to live with Frank. I couldn't believe my luck in short.

He was attentive and loving, at least, in my mind. I am sure that my current boyfriend is much better but back then I didn't know better.

We spoke for a few hours. He asked me why I said it and if he could take back what he had done. I almost agreed to stay, but I guess my heart knew my time was over.

Eventually he gave me some clothes and we went to see my mom. I think he really intended to drop me there and say goodbye but her indifference shook both of us.

I asked myself that question a lot. I think that indeed, something died inside of me. It's weird. At first, after I said my safe word, I was empty inside.

I had no goal, no direction, no idea of who I was. Perhaps I was like a house that had been built on a shaky foundation.

Frank helped destroyed it which allowed me to rebuild it over the next few months or years. In the spirit of getting both sides, when you look back, is there anything you really regret doing or allowing to be done to you?

The 3 weeks of pet play were quite amusing. I had a lot of fun and is one of my fondest memories of the period.

If my boyfriend asked me to do BDSM again, I would probably hesitate, but I wouldn't mind doing pet play once more from time to time. I think I was shaking for hours and the marks on my breasts stayed for almost 2 days thought I have no idea how long it really was since I didn't have access to a clock.

I certainly would have been more clear on my expectations and my limits and I would have asserted myself more often.

We had a temporary safe-word, you know, to just stop what we were doing at the time but not the entire period.

I should have used it for the blindfolds and the no-talking, but then again, perhaps I would still be there with rotten tooths.

Certainly I would have insisted on regular walks outside and access to a calendar, but then again, the disorientation about the time seemed to have helped me overcome my problems.

I am certainly a better person now, but perhaps a normal boyfriend would have brought the same results. Maybe you needed the kind of attention someone like Frank to get you on the right road?

That's definitely not something a normal boyfriend could do. Have you seen the movie Secretary? Yeah I think someone who has suffered trauma like yours would need something extreme to really knock you back into your life.

It sounds like you were essentially brainwashed from the experience of living with your parents. I'm not saying that this was the best solution for you or that this sort of extreme situation would help everyone.

But there's a reason that many monastic orders take vows of silence. It really gives your brain time to process the things that happen to us in our daily lives.

Many of us spend so much time plugged in that we forget that we exist outside of our minds. I dunno, but when you said that this time gave you a sort of restart it made perfect sense to me.

But I'd just like to say that I'm glad you made it out safely. I hope the rest of your life just gets better from here. And perhaps that's why the last bit of silence caused me to stop it, especially when coupled with the blindfold.

Is there a reason for this? He said he'd take you to see a doctor - did that not extend to dentists? I think my lack of visits to the dentist for 16 months shocked him more than the fact I spent those 16 months naked.

Since I wasn't really normal, I thought he was actually normal about dental hygiene until Reddit pointed it out. If you're not exaggerating about "5 times a day" that's actually too much.

Like, you can cause damage brushing your teeth that frequently. Maybe the bf has just a touch of dental OCD? The first time you went to a dentist after the ordeal, did you have many cavities?

I never once went to a dentist as a kid my parents sucked, not as much as yours and I rarely remembered to brush my teeth, but the first time I had my teeth cleaned 2 years ago - I'm 27 I only had two cavities.

I was actually kind of shocked. Dental strength can vary a lot from person to person I brush my teeth and see the dentist regularly, but I still get a shit-ton of cavities.

I must have had 12 or so, about half on baby teeth. Can't upvote that enough! Normal seems to be times per day and some people take gums, others floss, most people that floss do it not every day.

At the point you were when he picked you? Hell, even for keeping you away from drugs he pretty much saved your ass. And as boyfriends go, he was very close to what you needed.

Plus I have a feeling it helped a lot that he was a bit older and more experienced you didn't say this, but it's a safe guess.

Living and talking with him for more then a year probably was good education for you. Your "mentor" if you will Many of us had one I'm still grateful for mine.

I think so too. Not being in school anymore meant I no longer had a ton of "safe" guys wanting to give me drugs for sex.

Your "mentor" if you will. He taught me to cook and do his laundry I didn't really have any laundry. That was already more than my mother did for me.

I don't think so. Most men at this age are off pursuing their dreams and don't have time to give that much attention to a woman. The dream is rarely to take care of a woman.

I think it would be odd if you found someone who took care of you as well as Frank did. I honestly think he's a good guy based on your account of him.

I'll also add that your emotional experience is the extreme of many women I have met. Most of the time, it's not hard for me to find a girl who craves attention in exchange for one thing or another.

I usually assume it's some parental issue, because I don't see where they would find that a sufficient affection other than through family.

I respectfully think more people should read your story. It would help enlighten people on how abuse affects the people around them.

Your story is extraordinary to say the least. Slaves get no respect. No respect I tells ya. I went to a fetish party once.

I got slapped around, insulted and degraded. Some guy even used me as a toilet. I was there for a tickle fetish.

No respect at all. So my wife, she says 'Rodney, I want to fuck you hard'. I goes up to the bedroom expecting a night of passion.

I'm up there for hours and I'm thinking 'Whats taking her so long? I go downstairs to see all my stuff's gone.

She leaves me a note and says 'I fucked you good! I was a slave once. I went to one of them dungeon things. I'm an ugly man though.

Just not attractive at all. The slave master took one look at me and used his safe word. It's rough being me, its real rough.

Hey, you and me. We'd get along great. Real great I tells ya. The lawyer was initially denied access to Mr Makarov, but state ombudsman Tatyana Moskalkova intervened, and prison authorities relented.

His [anus] had been beaten. He had bruises in his eyes and his arms were damaged where the handcuffs had dug in. A short while after the publication of the video, the Russian State Penitentiary Service and the Yaroslavl State Investigative Committee announced they would begin an investigation into the incident.

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Made by Jacques Biederer Ostra Studio , a Paris photographer of high-class erotica. Was astonished to discover he also dabbled in stag films.

He influenced later artists John Willie, Irving Klaw, et al. Blooper: You can glimpse a still cameraman on the right side for a second, possibly Biederer himself.

More to come, including another Ostra featurette.

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1 Kommentar

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